My boring story or June /July 2021

 Thursday June 3rd Nabila and the famous mindfuck :P

As I was discussing things with my psychologist Nabila I mentioned I used to meditate before and kind of stopped and she said well won't you start again? And I said well you know me and the big D word we're not really good friends: D being Discipline.

And she said (knowing me a little) Why don't you think of it as ROUTINE then instead of DISCIPLINE.

You LIKE routine. And there we went from there.

Started Meditation on Friday June 4th and I barely missed a day ever since, 

(maybe one but I am not sure). 

If I don't start at my set time 4PM I do it before or after it doesn't matter but I get it done before tea time (6:30PM here)

And to this I gradually added Walking Meditation following instructions from my fav monk: Yuttadhammo Bhikkhu a "kid" from Ontario, my son's age.

Walking meditation went well for a few days just walking around the park at the end of the driveway and then just became walking.

Fast forward to around June 18th and I saw a video of a black guy telling a story and saying that day that he looked black more than ever with his do-rag and this timbs. Googling both I said Hey I GOT TIMBS:) Those walking boots I bought in England barely used.

 

So I started wearing those instead of my faithful New Balance 857 who had taken me for a gazillion steps in Montreal in 2018 and Arles in 2017.

Then I started noticing an infection on my left big toe which kept getting worse and worse and me being the space cadet that I am never put two and two together  but started taking antibiotics instead. Then this infection really flared up after my 5000 steps on July 3rd.

Things got worse and weather didn't help so my walking really diminished after that until I went to see my GP on Thursday and then an emergency meeting with my podiatrist on Friday  July 16th who just pulled the dead nail right out took one look at my boots and said here is your problem your left boot is too small. 

So now pain and infection free and one nail short I resumed my walking yesterday in that pouring rain just to go buy shoes.

So here I am back at the grind and trying to reestablish my walking and meditation routine.

Wednesday July 21st now and looking forward to my new routine.

Eventually it will add up to weight loss somewhere sometime :) but still in the meantime a better way to spend my time.

Next goal is to walk to the Indian Ocean It shouldn't be too difficult even if I HAVE to call for a ride back after.

857 to 624 

Now on the shoes well I have been an exclusive New Balance guy for donkeys years trying to always go up a number or two having been told but not verified that the higher the number the better shoe.

But this time I had to make an exception. As much as I LOVED my 857 and they have been very good to me for a million miles and many many years and I really wanted to repeat the experience but the $200 tag price was just a little more than I was ready to pay. 

So after much shopping and 4000 + steps I decided to opt for a pair of 624 for $70 which will have to do for now. 

They had a good run today at 7000 steps and I am looking forward to crank up the mileage on those in the near future. Usually my shoes only get a beating when I travel (i.e. Montreal and Arles) but now they will get their money's worth locally.

Meditashun Progris Riport

 I am a grammar Nazi except when it comes to Charlie Gordon and Flowers for Algernon! :) 

Well it's been almost 6 weeks now so I thought I'd lay down my thoughts about my "progris".

It all started on Thursday June 3rd when I was at Nabila's, my psychologist.  I did mention that I did some meditation in the past and she suggested I tried again to which I answer yeah but no but yeah but I am not very good at the D word: DISCIPLINE.

So the clever one answered, knowing me a little, why don't you think of it as a ROUTINE instead,
you LIKE routine. 

I swear the devil is a woman lol.

So here I am starting on
Friday June 4th and now
Saturday July 10th and I hardly missed a day IIRC,
maybe ONE but I forgot.

Oh yeah the deal with said psychologist was once a week.

It has been and still is a compelling provocative experience. 

(I had to hit the Thesaurus for a few synonyms for interesting lol)

Now one could really get completely lost researching the subject.

Wow there is a gazillion gurus out there and all of them better than the others. I was trying to find the middle way in the middle way.

Not too keen on the strong Buddhist approach as it irks my sceptical humanist atheist nature.
So I tried different approach especially one monk who I thought was a bit more balanced even though as much as I respect him I would not live his life for sure. 
Also Jon Kabat-Zinn is usually a safe bet as well and for some odd reason
I tend to stay away from Sam Harris, some sort of irrational dislike somehow and prolly not antisemitism lol as JKZ is alright in my book.

Speaking of I was pleased to hear my fav monk that they had been MANY holocausts.

So now what? I would like to think that it has already produced some benefits I think even though I suck at introspection but one example springs to  mind dealing with greed and aversion and likes and dislikes and what not. 

I was sitting in the car really annoyed by a really dirty windscreen and it always creates some tension when I ask for it to be cleaned so instead I put that under my dislikes and decided to observe my reaction instead of reacting to it.

between the two poles of expression and suppression

lies a third option - mere observation.

Otherwise I don't know life goes on I had added some walking meditations to this and then just some plain walking but I have been held down lately by an infected big toe and some lousy stormy weather. 

I DID do my 4 PM meditation though today my usual 30 mins even though I have had 40 and 45 mins too lately.

Still looking for the middle way in the middle way though :P

Oh yeah as I observe my thoughts and my mind my place of predilection seems to be the near future LOL

My mind always wander to what I will do right after my meditation and
I call my meditation a success when I don't react to all these urges LOL

I have been quite proud of myself too last few days for NOT looking at my timer or at the time another daily obsessi0n of mine to know what time it is and how long til this or that.

I just wait for my bell more or less patiently.

So here it is my last 40 days which I noticed also seem to keep me away from my blog???  

Correlation is NOT Causation or so they say.