Monday, November 29, 2010

Different Peeves Jeeves!

Top 10 road rage starters 


1. Not holding steering wheel in ''correct’’ 10-to-two position 46% 
2. Not applying handbrake at traffic lights 37% 
3. Accelerating between speed cameras 31% 
4. Exceeding urban speed limit 28% 
5. Drinking and eating while driving 21% 
6. Coasting with clutch down 14% 
7. Using horn through frustration 12% 
8. Passing through amber or red traffic lights 12% 
9. Not concentrating 11% 
10. Putting car’s nose out at junctions 7% 


That dont make no sense at all to me! 
Totally dumbfounded on this one! 
It seems to sprout out of some form of self righteousness applied to others in rage as it often is.


Anyhoot my self righteousness doesn't talk the same language at all.


So Here is what I want you to do all of you dumb drivers out there.


1. Drive at the speed limit.
People driving 50 in a 70 should be hung and quartered or simply retired somewhere on an isolated island.
P.S. if you like speeding I dont mind at least you wont be in my way (I myself am trying to put my speeding days behind me) but then again do pass me as soon as you can and DO NOT TAILGATE ME or I WILL slow down just to piss you off. 


2. Let me say this gently Dear drivers ...
a round about ...
is NOT A FUCKING STOP SIGN YOU ARCH MORONS!
Be aware. As a defensive driver you are supposed to look way in front of you and KNOW what is going on.
A round about is not a good moment to have your head way up your ass contemplating your own shit.
By the time you get to a round about you should know there was no one coming for 5 miles around you headless idiot.


3. If you are about to turn into a busy road and intend to drive 50 on a 70 again and you see me coming at 70 and not a bloody car behind me for blooming miles well just fucking wait asshole.   
It is usually a goddamn local yokel that does this to me too who is going to turn to another side street soon and in no hurry or any concerns for others either. 
I think this one is an international disease.


4.  Same thing applies on a left turn when the light is red on the incoming traffic you should bloody KNOW that it is a smooth drive and turn with no stops needed or involved if you knew what you were doing when you approached the intersection.


5. Errrrrr what else? Oh yeah a short flashing right turn light 
AGAIN WAKE THE FUCK UP AND MOVE THE FUCK ON 
WHY THE FUCK should I have to miss my right turn and wait just because you are a fucking moron?


Most of my frustrations, and they are legions and many and often, seem to be because I am in the fucking suburbs where all the twits retire.


So basically all I want is considerate and respectful driving from all of us with a smooth regular flow. :) Otherwise use one of those self propelling chair on the sidewalk or just stay home.


It seems that most of my pet peeves have to do with the original number 9... not concentrating.


So to repeat the good old christian values love one another and leave me the fuck alone and stay clear out of my way! :)









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