Same exercise in futility I guess.
And an extreme futility would prolly be to write my autobiography.
I was gonna write what I thought to be a redundancy by saying
Writing my Own Autobiography but I suppose many autobiographies are not one's own with ghost writers and not mentioning twisted deformed memories and also the automatic lies of rose coloured glasses when it comes to self inspection
My "prison years" as I have just mentioned on Facebook should maybe get expanded one day I suppose.
Especially the
12 october 1976 to June 10 1988
Dates I still remember even though I struggle a little on the first.
They have been somewhat covered somewhere I am quite sure things starting on august 12 1976 and ending up in a life sentence on 12 october 1976.
I call them prison years because as a cult we were much isolated from the real world watching and listening ONLY to what Francis Cormier would decide or want to watch.
4 of them years being isolated in a desolated frozen ghost town.
And there was ALSO the strange comeback now I would have to look at my reminder to quote the dates.
recorded as such
March 1989 33 First time to see the kids in 9 months (9, 7, 5)
24-08-89 33 Dad passed away
June 1990 34 Second Entry in the cult
June 1991 35 End of one year “probation”
14-03-1992 36 Second Departure from the cult (Kids 12, 10, 8)
25-12-1993 37 First time to see the kids in One Year and 9 Months (14, 11, 10)
Jan to June 1994 6 months of silence treatment ( 15,12,10)
So June 1990 to 14 march 1992 ALSO
I should try to recall the years of "recovery" too one day I guess
i.e. March 1992 to Sept 2001
Anyway in all but a short time it will be all dust in the wind and absolute nothingness much like everything else
NUMBERS again
The question of "how many people have ever lived?" or "what percentage of people who have ever lived are alive today" can be traced to the 1970s.[9] The more dramatic phrasing of "the living outnumber the dead" also dates to the 1970s, a time of population explosion and growing fears of human overpopulation in the wake of decolonization and before the adoption of China's one-child policy. The claim that "the living outnumber the dead" was never accurate (although it may be roughly accurate if only ancestral population is considered). Arthur C. Clarke in 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) has the claim that "Behind every man now alive stand 30 ghosts, for that is the ratio by which the dead outnumber the living", which was roughly accurate at the time of writing.[10]
Recent estimates of the "total number of people who have ever lived" are in the order of 100 billion.[11] The answer naturally depends on the definition of "people", i.e. is only Homo sapiens to be counted, or all of genus Homo, but due to the small population sizes in the Lower Paleolithic, the order of magnitude of the estimate is not affected by the choice of cut-off date substantially more than by the uncertainty of estimates throughout the Neolithic to Iron Age.[12] The estimate is more crucially affected by the estimate of infant mortalities vs. stillborn infants, due to the very high infant mortality throughout the pre-modern period. An estimate on the "total number of people who have ever lived" as of 1995 was calculated by Haub (1995) at "about 105 billion births since the dawn of the human race" with a cut-off date at 50,000 BC (beginning of the Upper Paleolithic), and an inclusion of a high infant mortality rate throughout pre-modern history.[13]
3,562,313,822 1968 times 30 = 106,869,414,660
Arthur C. Clarke wasn't that far off.
I am one in 100 billion
To put this in perspective I just reach 2 billion seconds
at 63 and 4 months
1 billion seconds =
31.7097919838
times 100 =
so roughly it would take you 3171 years to count to 100 billion
with a count of 7,759,856,000 according to worldometer we have now nearly 8% of all the humans that ever lived
January is not even finished and nearly 4 million have died
and 9.5 million have been born.
Sometimes I worry about my level on the autism spectrum LOL
I jokingly say I have Asperger when I pull a Rainman tantrum when things don't go as expected.
160,000 a day
160,000 PEOPLE DIE EVERY SINGLE DAY
How many made the news?
86,400 seconds in a day so we are very close to 2 deaths every single second.
As the myth goes:
During a U2 concert in Glasgow, Scotland, Bono asked the audience for total quiet.
Then in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands. Once every few seconds. Holding the audience in total silence, he said into the microphone "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies."
From the front of the crowd, a broad Scottish accent pierced the quiet: "Well fuckin' stop doin' it then ya evil bastard!"
So here we go again got distracted, sidetracked, and diverged again
too many side quests in this game of life. :P
My writing like my photo taking is in much need of strong edition but life is NOT edited so I do prefer my "stream of consciousness" if we can call what I do consciousness.
All this to say I missed much of the 80's and the 90's were a rough road of recovery and too soon all this might all even be forgotten even before my death. It sure is all totally irrelevant in the big picture as I said often.
Our conception of time is slow and warped but give it a few million or billion years at most and ALL of our memories will be star dust
...too be continued
Doc
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