Friday, May 27, 2022

Fair Game for the Reaper

 


So far this week I have "seen" two 66 yrs old and one 67 die.

At 66 now, it is quite clear to me
that I AM Fair Game for the Grim REAPER.

As a Matter of Fact we ALL ARE fair game for the reaper

but still as you age the odds get bigger and bigger. 

Remember in this game of Life that the HOUSE ALWAYS WIN.

Entropy is INEXORABLE. (Cannot be prayed out of literally )

or as Dorothy Parker says :

"I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, 

but in all history, 

which has held billions and billions of human beings, 

not a single one ever had a happy ending." 


Saturday, May 21, 2022

Talking to myself aka should of built a Smitadin



Here we go, gotta get that story  off my chest,

I was playing with my Ladder Paladin last night, doing a Hell Baal run or two. He is now a proper FISTHIS lol
That is his name: Fist of Heaven all the way
no TryBrid no nothing and no special gear either,
no HOZ yet, (Herald of Zakarum)

First I get killed by fanatic Stygian Dolls in the throne room then as I get to Baal Chamber who shows up? 

Well the Diablo Clone Himself, first time in years.
(I had an episode a little earlier where he showed up but I never saw him since I was naked and  my body was behind miles of Lightning Shooting Gloams)

FOH, wasn't going to work here.  Holy Bolt neither so my only chance was with a lvl 6 Smite and lvl 6 Fanaticism. 

I had him down to about a sliver and then HELL BROKE LOOSE literally.

I died many times just trying to get back to my body either because I forgot a TP or didn't have time to use one. Them Lightning Gloams again.  Plus when I resurrected my merc a million time I withdrew like 800000 gold and forgot to put the rest back so I lost that too a few times.

So after an hours of sweat and tears and frustration I finally called it quits very reluctantly. 

I had no Full Rejuvs left after using a WHOLE inventory stash of them, I wasted 3 million gold in various stupid ways.

I had a Lightsaber  luckily and a life tap wand as well but it wasn't enough.

What needed to be done and I Didn't want to do it is use my last  respec (in hell diff luckily) to build a FULL SMITADIN but then my best char would be reduced to fight the clone and that is IF I have made a Lobby game and can transfer chars.

I have just DONE a 2nd respec to FOH so  I still wanted to try this build properly and until I find an infamous token of absolution that will take a long long time.


I lost sleep over this arduous ordeal and almost lost my D2R MOJO altogether. 


O well I have a new Guardian armour I have to try now not for me since I don't have the strength req but for my merc to see how he handles these Travincal Hydras at now 87% resist all

And there is always something to work on as usual.  My Javazon is getting a little tiring in hell diff as everyone and his mate are lightning immune.


I prolly need to work on my Necro on my 2nd account on the laptop so maybe he can carry her to all these Hell Baal runs too.

My sorc needs some work as well.

I might just live to see another day :|

O well Life goes on says John Cougar Mellencamp

Long after the thrill of livin' is gone




Wednesday, May 18, 2022

To my poor dying blog

I realise this is a slow year and a normal process for a blog.


This site here used to tell IIRC how many blogs die each day.


Anyway just a short note / trigger to repeat the same old thing again the trigger this time being this



Always an interesting concept to deal with guilt and all the Freudian defence mechanisms  carried around many religions.  The word SIN bugs me to no end as it has been used for the evilest thing by the evilest people for control reasons, HELL I even hate the word EVIL lol:
All man-made concepts that came with consciousness.


As a quick note as this is pretty well the only thing I want to repeat today on that famous word SIN of which I have written much about before


The ONLY SIN AFAIAC IS:

SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS

The common concept in so so many historical dramas and history.


Because in the end as Andre Fortin said:
Y'a pas d'coupables, Y'a pas de honte.

But SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS ,
(comparable to the old unforgivable HUBRIS in Greek Mythology,)
 is the source and the head of much much much UGLINESS in this world.


Watching Gentleman Jack this week has reminded me of that too.

So here it is for the moment my short repeat of a repeat of a repeat


Ciao for now back to the illusions of Diablo :P 

P.S. O well there was a time when I had a search bar in  my blog but now I can't find it so to read some of my old ramblings if you can find it search for HAMARTIA




Tuesday, March 22, 2022

Curmudgeon

 


Curmudgeon

Barely out of bed and said FFS twice already! lol

First a chess streamer I don't particularly like says a chess grandmaster has been banned
(the clickbait didn't mention for 6 months only),
I look at the time and it's almost 30 mins!!!
THIRTY FUCKING MINUTES for a piece of news that takes 30 fucking second to read. 
You fucking streamers are so hubristic,
like sports commentators
you worship the sound of your own voice.

Moving on.

Next one: Coronavirus Guided Meditation 

— Boost your Immunity against COVID19

double FFS

I don't wanna live on this planet anymore.

Like Garfield: As far as I am  concerned my day is over




Friday, March 18, 2022

I'd like to disagree with Job here

 but I know that my redeemer doesn't exist.

"I'll make it up to you"

je vais me rattraper google

Je vais vous rattraper bing

In French translation it gives a sense of catching up.

Catching up TO WHAT is my question???

Another biblical concept here similar to the word sin in Greek:

HAMARTIA

i.e missing the FUCKING mark

This big notion of redemption is to me fundamentally wrong and probably utter bullshit made up in some control freak mind to use, abuse, and control others, based on imposing guilt and shame: 2 adorable concepts .... NOT

A concept that comes in so many songs.

Mind you another concept that comes in an awful lot of songs is:

I wanna get laid and I'll say anything to get to that goal.

Elvis comes to mind here.  It's now or never.

If I could turn back the hands of time and other bullshit.

English is funny that way with its hundreds of expanded verbs utterly change by adding some preposition: 

like knocked up is not the same as knocked down.

To impose shame on you and the idea that you need to redeem yourself somehow is just pure evil if you ask me.

Sure one can decide to do better with one self but shame is man-made.

The older I get the more I like the French expression in André Fortin's song:


Y'A PAS D'COUPLABLES, Y'A PAS DE HONTE

there is no guilt there is no shame

an expression in context to someone who is near death 

but somehow one is ALWAYS near death relatively.

But again most of these making up songs or wanting to make up are nothing short really of:

I wanna get laid again song.

it reminds me of Jack Lucas in Fisher King:

Jack’s line “Suicidal paranoiacs will say anything to get laid,” was added by Gilliam on set because he was afraid that the character would have a tiny shred of likeability left in him.

Anyway as Dylan says so well:


I'd forever talk to you

But soon my words would turn into a meaningless ring

For deep in my heart

I know there's no help I can bring


Love this song still as relevant today as it was then


for instance change/adapt 2 words in this verse and bam voila 

welcome to the 21st century


From fixtures and forces and friends your sorrow does stem

That hype/#hash you

And type / #tag  you

And making you feel that you gotta be just like them


We are what we are and sometimes, many times we fuck up and that is it. There is no redeeming, no making up: just try not to fuck up too many times that's all.



Monday, February 21, 2022

Paradise by the dashboard lights

 


Paradise

To Build around, Form a wall around.

A funny imaginary concept as old as the hills.

The simplest definition might be Kurt Vonnegut Jr.'s actually.

EVERYTHING WAS BEAUTIFUL

AND NOTHING HURT.

It is the carrot waved by all priests. ministers, imams and whosoever doesn't have any power on earth but waves an imaginary stick.

Detective Rust Cohle : The ontological fallacy of expecting a light at the end of the tunnel, well, that's what the preacher sells, same as a shrink. See, the preacher, he encourages your capacity for illusion. Then he tells you it's a fucking virtue. Always a buck to be had doing that, and it's such a desperate sense of entitlement, isn't it?


Of course we would all love a paradise, a nirvana, a santuary a what not.

Something tells me now that H.G. Wells was right and that it would come at a terrible cost to us.

Apparently this human condition is meant for struggle and we cannot have the Eloi without the Morlocks unfortunately.

Too bad for any of youse who have never read the Time Machine or watch the movie: it is such a picture worth more than 2000 words.

But we sure can dream about it in all languages and all cultures everyone of them with a different conception of what it would be like.  To some sad primitive civilisation this realm was associated with war and warriors.

What a brilliant idea to put such fallacies into some soldiers  mind really, probably where our word berserk comes from.

The same brilliant idea that allows nobodies to call themselves priests and wave a big phony god stick to submit people to their will with a power that does not exist.

Like Rusty said: Always a buck to be had doing that.

Mind you 'my' paradise would be a little less religious and a little more Huxleyan really.

There are as many paradises as there are human beings so it is a number constantly growing. 

Hell some of them might fathom 2 or 3 or many more paradises of their own.

Milton, Dante and so many others had a go at imagining their imaginary world and writing it down.

And that is not counting the many other Oriental inventions there has been over many millenniums.

One can imagine as much as one wants there is no mechanic on earth to ever ever make this happen though.

As I said many many times we simply do not have enough brain cells in our simian system.  

Might as well imagine a paradise of apes.

The first thing that always comes to my mind though as a dreamer in this imaginary Utopia would be NO WAR for sure.

I also like very much the Brave New World idea of 

Children Factories.

I have seen enough atrocities and real murders and real serial killers where it is the parents that should have got the death penalty and much of the damage in life and in mental health is parental a lot of the time.

Much of this damage is also FUBAR.

Anyway nothing new under the sun.

Same old ramblings as always.

But it is always nice to imagine a BETTER WORLD

a safe HAVEN somewhere in the dark recesses of the mind.

From what I gather it would seem that all attempts at 

EgalitĂ©, FraternitĂ© et LibertĂ© are totally doomed almost as a mathematical rule.  

We ALWAYS ALWAYS have to resort to the LCD.

the LOWEST Common Denominator.

As George Carlin once said:

Imagine the average stupid person and now realise that

Half of them are stupider than that.

Maybe that is what they mean by Pareto distribution.

Of course also the number alone of people is not helping at all without going into culling eugenics here.

But for some strange reason it seems smaller countries managed better with the pandemic in some places.

Anyway over and out for this entropic brain who has run over these lines way too many times.

Now we haven't even mentioned GNR Paradise or Meatloaf's!

that is another story for another time children :)







Wednesday, February 9, 2022

Question Everything


ONE should question ONEself
if ONE wants to change the world
after reading ONE book!

ONE should question ONEself
when ONE wants to change the world
after reading ONE book.

I should know. 

I still have this book here ticked 7 times on the front page and 12 times in the middle (NT)

When I was a 40 years younger zealot, a fellow American wanted to give me a bottle of whisky for services rendered.

Delivery speed was very important in these days and I did this colleague of ours many favours.

Me being a zealot and not drinking at the time asked him for a nice KJV leather bound bible instead

which I still have to this day.


HELL many people go way off the track even after reading many many books.  Hitchens and Peterson come to mind here.


Same with videos these days. How many expert ignoranus do we have that just watch a couple of videos on YouTube?

I like the word IGNORANUS, meaning you know nothing AND you're an asshole. :P

Having been in a cult for more than 20 years kind of gives me an insight in the world around us really.

Especially in this day of fast spreading ignorance and conspiracy mushrooming.

Anyway better write this while I still can as I see my decline sliding down every day with no one to explain it to me.

Hell my geriatrician wanted to charge me to tell me one more time that she has no fucking idea of what is going on.

Short one for now over and out for the moment.


P.S. It is a SAD world though when now I have to question my own quotes on questioning

it's like every time I mention censorship now I have to take in account 

that SOME censorship is now necessary in this murderous, mindless, ignorant world.

I do realize that everything can be taken the WRONG way and even sensible Whitman quotes like "question everything"

have to be questioned these days baring in mind that this very saying is gonna used and misused by thousands of brainwashed, sectarian, cult like conspiracists now.