The N word

The following I'm assured is a true story, although I wish it wasn't.

Several months ago, a 48-year-old single mother informed her two teenage children that the cancer in her breast had returned, more aggressive than ever.

She had no idea how they would react, so wasn't surprised when her stunned son asked incredulously, ''What does this mean?''

''I'll tell you what it means,'' her daughter interjected angrily. ''It means we're not going to Fiji for Easter!''

Now, if you're anything like me, youare probably contemplating the many ways in which you would suggest to thatgirl that she get a grip. But some of you are also possibly cringing, awarethat that teen could be yours. Because today, such a display of narcissisticpersonality disorder (NPD) is no longer an anomaly in teenagers, it isbeginning to be the norm.

April 20 th 2013

I don’t have a PhD in psychology or psychiatry or for anything at all really but the media madness to declare themselves all-knowing and ride the popular waves as if they created them irks me to no end.

Even in so-called professional magazines with licensed psychologists and crap Reader’s Digest's like Psychology Today,the term is used and abused and thrown away freely. 

The term being a word I have personal issues with: 

NARCISSISTIC.

For one thing everyone’s fucking ex was a fucking narcissistic pig because he didn’t worship me, or understand me, or cater to me or lost his will and everything to me.

Who is narcissistic now pray tell?

Does this make me narcissistic now to think this way? 

Frankly at this point I don’t care and I don’t wanna know anymore.  I have dealt with this doubt many a times and now put it aside. 

The jury is still out.

But it still remains that like people do always they love throwing names they don’t know shit about. People love being judgemental and sit on their little home made thrones and pretend to be Napoleon or the pope.

The outrageous reaction described above calls for many names right away: 

psychotic, 

neurotic at best, 

utterly callous and selfish ,

heartless,

and certainly devoid of empathy altogether 

but to me it doesn’t spell the N word.

Anyway to go on and on on this would defeat the point wouldn’t it?

Nuff said methinks.

Psychology is not a fucking science

Just spent like 10 minutes in this field to be more confused than ever again.

First by learning new names of laws again that warp psychological studies without mentioning cognitive biases and what not 

• Goodhart’s Law is most succinct: “When a measure becomes a target, it ceases to be a good measure.”
• Campbell’s Law is the most explicit: “The more any quantitative social indicator is used for social decision-making, the more subject it will be to corruption pressures and the more apt it will be to distort and corrupt the social processes it is intended to monitor.”
• The Cobra Effect refers to the way that measures taken to improve a situation can directly make it worse.

and then I started reading this article in the horrible reader’s digest of PsychologyToday (might as well listen to a TED talk eh?) and the more I read the more question I had. 

It was about boy vs girl and a few doubtful statements were made as they do and I had this clever hunch that the whole article was written by a ‘GIRL’ and lo and behold it was!
I am so clever sometimes! J

Then she proceeded in a deeper black hole called morals and that was it I had to check the source and lo and behold again I was right. 

Quelle Surprise!

A seminarian FFS! 

Teaching at Notre-Dame what next?
She is a ‘scientist’ creationist too? 

When you start mixing your so-called science with your archaic pre-conceived matriarchal society beliefs there is no end to where you may end and of course everyone being a fucking Napoleon everyone will have all the rationalisation possible to stand solid on their wrong foundation as one does.

My first alarm bell was when she went like this

·         Boys mature slower physically, socially and linguistically.  CHECK!

·         Stress-regulating brain circuitries mature slower in boys prenatally, perinatally and postnatally.  MAYBE

·         Boys are affected more negatively by early environmental stress, inside and outside the womb, than are girls. Girls have more built-in mechanisms that foster resiliency against stress.  WHATTTTTTTTTTT?

Everybody does that, the JWs are one of my best examples they bring one or two truths to get your confidence and then bury you in dubious facts to confuse the fuck out of you.

. Girls have more built-in mechanisms that foster resiliency against stress.  FFS

Where did you get that one now? 

My first thought going on how extremely complex and warped a mother daughter relationship can be at times and that to me there are just as many fucked-up females as there are males, 

each having just their peculiar way of being fucked-up.  

And yes in a matriarchal society of course the outcome would be warped for both.

 
As Freud said if it’s not one thing, it’s your mother! J

To begin with any of those studies absolutely cannot “not be biased” as the sex of the author will warp a lot of preconceived ideas as it was so obvious in this short text.

Anyway what is the word I learnt and forgot already now? Will have to stick to dilettante now damn memory it was such a nice word too.

SCIOLIST! 

YES! Thank fuck for browsing history in the age of Alzheimer’s.

One who exhibits only superficial knowledge; a self-proclaimed expert with little real understanding. 

I is a sciolist! :) 

She is also an expert on circumcision would you believe and on breast feeding as well extremely popular apparently too but that has always been a bad sign to me too.

Genetic determinism is so 20^th century. In the 21^st century, we now know that epigenetics are involved in most outcomes: experience shapes how and whether a gene is expressed or activated. Humans are the most epigenetically shapeable creatures, making violent disposition a matter of experience. In early life, humans are the most epigenetically plastic (with only 25% of adult brain size in place) (Narvaez, Panksepp, Schore & Gleason, 2013).

The more I read the more I wanna puke.  Home birth Jesus had one etc and this here

The table shows that every study is flawed-  (she says)
except mine of course as always.

Psychology and much of science I am afraid is very much like art;

a field of inflated egos full of hot air valuating nothingness and ignorance.

I am glad I got this blog to hide behind as of course I would be awkwardly silent in a head to head debate with many but debates don’t prove shit, both parties go back home as convinced as they were when they entered.  Hot air is hot air no matter what you call it and like in religion here there is a stench of pre conceived ideas first and then looking for evidence to support my proud and arrogant and foolish stand backed up as always by a few sycophants.

• Goodhart’s Law is most succinct: “When a measure becomes a target, it ceases to be a good measure.”
• Campbell’s Law is the most explicit: “The more any quantitative social indicator is used for social decision-making, the more subject it will be to corruption pressures and the more apt it will be to distort and corrupt the social processes it is intended to monitor.”
• The Cobra Effect refers to the way that measures taken to improve a situation can directly make it worse.

P.S. Just a short note here to remark that a site I used to love very much just like everything else is suffering from catalytic entropy.

The article in Wikipedia could not be more self-praising and biased.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darcia_Narvaez

Also https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McLaren_Flint  "forgets"  to mention that

On January 13, 2016, Snyder said that 87 cases of Legionnaires' disease, a waterborne disease, were reported in Genesee County from June 2014 – November 2015, resulting in 10 deaths. Although the Michigan Department of Health and Human Services (MDHHS) said that there is no evidence of a clear link between the spike in cases and the water system change,^[3] Edwards stated the contaminated Flint water could be linked to the spike, telling reporters:

It's very possible that the conditions in the Flint River water contributed. We've actually predicted earlier this year that the conditions present in Flint would increase the likelihood of Legionnaires' disease. We wrote a proposal on that to the National Science Foundation that was funded, and we visited Flint and did two sampling events. The first one was focused on single family homes or smaller businesses. We did not find detectable levels of Legionella bacteria that causes disease in those buildings. But during our second trip, we looked at large buildings, and we found very high levels of Legionella that tends to cause the disease.^[80]

In a second report released January 21, state researchers had still not pin-pointed the source of the outbreak.^[81] The next day, an official at McLaren Regional Medical Center in Flint put out a press release that said:

After the City of Flint switched to the Flint River as its water source in April of 2014, we noticed an increase in the number of Legionella cases that were coming to McLaren for treatment, as well as those being reported across the county and at other hospitals. Because of that concern, and concern over the quality of water that we were receiving from the city, we began aggressively testing our water supply. An early test result indicated the presence of a low level Legionella. All Legionella and lead testing continues to show that the McLaren Flint water supply is well within safety and quality standards. It is important to note that no test have ever determined that McLaren is the source of exposure for any patients testing positive for the Legionella antigen, and that there is no definitive data to support that McLaren Flint is the source of exposure for any patient testing positive for the Legionella antigen.^[82]

Casually mentioned in https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flint_water_crisis

Well mentioned for now until Winston Smith gets to it to ‘correct’ it.

  

PROGRIS RIPORT

Saturday March 18^th, 2017

I find myself worried more and more at my lack of attention, my lack of concentration or mental stamina. 
A million things that would have caught my attention in the past can’t keep me for more than a minute these days,
30 seconds even rather. 

It is a little frightening to see it slowly slipping away. 
It makes me wonder if ever I will read the smallest book ever again. 
And moreover what will I do with the rest of my life?

I still get excited at a million things WANTING to know more but everything leads to an exhausting spiralling and endless labyrinth. 

One example among many now a friend mentions a sci-fi book,
light goes on right away.
I am on it.
Check the author.
Check the book.
Check his other books.
Oh Wow it deals about philosophy.
I love philosophy. Let’s open the next links:
Platonic Realism & Nominalism and then

BAM! I die. 

Just like I did before
but only after 4 or 5 books
now I die after 4 or 5 lines.  

And DYING is the best word I can think of. 
My other metaphor is that the wind stops blowing but now that wind has gone crazy if not crazier.

Not exactly sure what it is and Ritalin at this moment seems like a life saver.

The wind has stop blowing and my ship is in the middle of the ocean.

Some would say pick yourself up blah blah blah but they don’t understand.

This is not how my bipolar mind works at all.
The wind blows or it doesn’t blow (0 or 1)
and I am quite powerless over that wind from my simple POV.

Now I’ve got a feeling the wind will be fine in August despite or maybe because the enormous incoming change of routine. 
The wind has been good in the past in such situations.

That wind just about got me lost again in a short trip to the dunny hyperlinking mentally from a Dangerous Method to Stereotypical to which I will have to put on hold for now in the interest of concision. (Side note there is a reason why some things are called stereotypical and there is a tendency today to just reject them as if they never existed)

So time will tell which direction this Charlie Gordon is going: Dementia, Alzheimer’s or some other form of slow death or just your normal run of the mill dissassociative absent-minded professor genius.

I am certain many people are utterly satisfied with watching mindless sitcoms all day and utter trash TV of the reality show/housewives horrible type.  Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!

My dream persona wants to see itself reading endlessly all of Dostoyevsky, Dickens, Shakespeare, Balzac, and hell Zola and Hugo and Tolstoy too and so much more.
(Ibsen, Gogol, Pouchkine, Chekhov and on and on)
I envy very much Rowan Williams who learnt Russian in order to be able to read the works of Dostoyevsky in the original.

Know everything about history and science and what not.

My real persona is lazy as fuck unfortunately and has the concentration of a fly on shit even though I imagine the fly winning hands down, well little hairy legs down anyway.

And just as Charlie Gordon I feel as desperate and powerless trying to remember the glorious past that may or may not have existed. 

The good old age where I could do algebra with my eyes closed and could not explain it for the life of me because my mind skipped so many steps that others needed.

Or even the time not so long ago where I had an A- in Calculus just before my diagnoses of Diabetes which may or may not have to do with the whole situation as it is fucking hard to think I guess when your blood is as thick as molasses.

Here is another study I could get lost into: the brain decline in diabetics.

Anyway I just hope that wind changes soon as these windless days make me a bit wary of the kind of future I might or will have.

Over and Out for now Charlie Gordon.

P.S. I have this wonderful button on my browser that allows me to close 40 tabs all at once just to start all over again and open 40 more for nothing again. 
It must be somewhere in one of Dante’s Circle of Hell or some Serlingian Twilight Zone nightmare.

K what was I talking about already?  

Maybe I got a permanent MIB Neuralyzer implanted in my brain? 

😆

Street Signs or Priorities Totally Screwed

Where are we going?

Melbourne lobby group pushes for ‘gender-equal’ traffic light icons

In 2017 I would refrain to say I am a feminist.

Semantics again but the word has lost all meanings today.

I try very hard to stick to the old French Revolution motto even though this one too is getting so outdated today.

Liberté, égalité, fraternité and here we go again Triggered like Guy Fawkes' powder kegs.

FRATERNIWHAT? What is this patriarchal bullshit blah blah blah and so on just making sure we are not getting anywhere at all, contention for the sake of contention like the little belligerent pugilistic frustrated activist loser that you are.

I am not quite sure where I stand and who I stand with even though I do not have to stand with anyone at all. Like everything else in life I am more sure of the negatives, like who I DO NOT want to stand with.

One could start with the Desiderata I suppose.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.

Of course I do not believe in violence physical or emotional or of the passive-aggressive type.

An another thing I do not believe in is women in infantry.

To me that is pushing it too far.

Hell I don't even believe in men in infantry or any form of war so.

I have reservations about the police force too but I have to draw the line somewhere.

Of course I am writing this from a male point of view so I am biased but so is a woman towards woman so we're equal that way too.

My ideal world does not seem to include much work so we wouldn't have much to disagree on my planet. As I often said my ideal world looks very much like a scene from Time Machine 1960.

Even though his future vision has a little too much of Harrison Bergeron or Idiocracy to it not mentioning the fact that the casting director seemed to be a little Aryan to say the least.

So no Morlocks
(I can live with the Eloi's fashion 'sense' or lack thereof)
a little more intellectual matter moving a little bit like Alanis Morissette's Utopia
and a good mix of bohemian beauty of all colours with some not so beautiful but oh so interesting people and I hope we will have solved the problem of ageing by then.

Intellectual pursuits though seems to be much more part of the problem than part of the solution.

A little bit of daydreaming mixed with eat and drink and be merry seems better to me.

With all this I haven't said much about feminism and equality now have I?

I am taking the Morgan Freeman approach by denying its existence.
There is no black there is no white
there is no male there is no females
just us humans with our own aspirations.

Some differences do exist at many levels, biological as shown in the Olympics
and the ability of our livers to process alcohol apparently
and down to many other organic and hormonal levels.

For instance us blokes live shorter lives thanks to testosterone

and we do have to shave but we don't have to bleed monthly etc

Saying we are equal in rights now just brings another semantic problem where we all turn into Pauline Hanson.

Please explain equal.

Please explain rights.

As a matter of facts there are many societies where we are not equal and many societies are somewhat matriarchal in some ways. Think of the power of the Jewish mama, the Italian, the Greeks and the Japanese husband who brings his paycheck to the wife even though all these societies also have appalling male habits.

The world certainly needs some major improvements a million times a gazillion times more important than changing a bloody street sign FFS.

Think of all the baby girls in China think of all the oppression in many cultures and religions.

Bad enough that most girls family names are Damnatio memoriae if you study genealogy long enough.

So to all these SJW's straining the gnat and swallowing the camel I say get a life FFS and get your head out of your own ass.

~A nanosecond prolefeed!

~A nanosecond prolefeed!

What was I going to write now?

Reality? Who knows what the fuck reality is?

Communication? Staring at someone blankly trying to pretend to be interested but only preparing your own story in your head. 

Yeah yeah yeah nice cat now let me tell you about my FLUFFY…

Or one of my fav: Oh you got cancer oh that’s nothing wait until you go through a divorce now, my hell is so much bigger than yours …

You only have 3 points (I forgot what they were already) let me bring you MY FIVE points now…blah blah blah 

(even though there was really many more but numbers of points don’t count anymore like the Brilliant Brian Cox said I could quote you numbers until I am blue in the face

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxEGHW6Lbu8&t=232s

Literally “I could sit here and read out figures until I am blue in the face
… the absolute consensus says…I know you may try to argue with that but you can’t
and that was addressing a senator who after all is a paid puppet of think tanks aka large rich corporate Lobbyists.

 “The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.” King James Version (KJV).

Deep down I think we are all selfish and hypocritical and have double standards and the louder the protest the greater the guilt I’d say.

Freudian defence mechanisms, cognitive biases, a gazillion forms of fallacies: take your pick, none of us has the truth or ever will.

To one informed and knowledgeable ‘deity’ out there we would be pigs or ants at best, apes some would say. 

To anyone with real knowledge at all.

The bestest of the bestest are just not good enough, they argue among themselves like screaming pigs or apes. 

Add to this arrogance, ignorance, pride, conceit, and prejudice: human qualities apparently. Pretentiousness, stubbornness and other apian like virtues also. Simians at heart!

Politics Religion Philosophy and other exercises in futility are all the same… some pothead trying to tell you he is much better than you and he alone has the secret.

Considering much and many revelations of old were done in high states of sometimes savage inebriation or after having fallen down from as horse for example or a fever or other form of brain damages that we all buy as “illuminated”.

Bottom line is we are still ignorant apes killing each other at the slightest.

Some pretend they are holier than thou by abstaining from the only privilege in life really like eating etc depriving us of the four F’s:

The hypothalamus plays a major role in the regulation of basic drives related to survival, including the so-called "four F's":fighting, fleeing, feeding, and mating."

And mating forbid one would enjoy sex and wine now or even sleeping in.

So much seems to be driven by Power that sometimes I think Nietzsche was on to something. 

So so much will to just fucking CONTROL, 

tell you what is good what is bad 

what is acceptable and what is not.  

Here comes that jerry-rig of pretention and dumb will again… 

pretending that I am smarter than you, 

superior to you 

bigger better and brighter than you 

and here you have COLONIALISM in one fucking word and the excuse for the all the proselytising missionaries of the world.  

Let me teach you O ignorant barbarian how we drink tea properly here even if I have to bribe you with opium to prove to you my moral superiority. 

The whole history of both Americas and Australia is encapsulated in this.  

Africa the Caribbean and what not.  

Let me enslave you poor buggers who don’t have a pot to piss in so I can have my tea and coffee and sugar and chocolate dirt cheap.

I mean King Leopold is still on a fucking coin IIRC. 

How gross is that? 

Let me cut your arms off to show you who is the fucking civilised one here.

History is written by the victor and Hiroshima and Dresden become legendary examples where Dachau is still frowned upon as if one atrocity is better than another.

Ask anyone today how many people were killed during the holocaust and I bet most would say 6 million.

Forgotten numbers erased from history:

Broader definitions of so-called "parallel Holocausts" include the two-to-three million Soviet POWs who died as a result of mistreatment due to Nazi racial policies, two million non-Jewish ethnic Poles who died due to the conditions of Nazi occupation, 270,000 mentally and physically disabled killed in Germany's eugenics program, 90,000–220,000 Romani, 80,000–200,000 Freemasons, 20,000–25,000 Slovenes, 5,000–15,000 homosexuals, 2,500–5,000 Jehovah's Witnesses and 7,000 Spanish Republicans, bringing the death toll to around 11 million. The broadest definition would include six million Soviet civilians who died as a result of war-related famine and disease, raising the death toll to 17 million.^[331] A research project conducted by the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum estimated that 15 to 20 million people died or were imprisoned.^[11] Rudolph Rummel estimates the total democide death toll of Nazi Germany to be 21 million.

two-to-three million Soviet POWs

2 million non-Jewish Poles
270,000 mentally and physically disabled killed
90,000–220,000 Romani
80,000–200,000 Freemasons,
20,000–25,000 Slovenes
5,000–15,000 homosexuals
2,500–5,000 Jehovah's Witnesses
7,000 Spanish Republicans

bringing the death toll to around 11 million

A research project conducted by the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum estimated that 15 to 20 million people died

Rudolph Rummel estimates the total democide death toll of Nazi Germany to be 21 million.

21 million minus 6 million that is 15 million forgotten ones 

2.5 times 6 exactly

15 million Orwellian unpersons!

Erased from history

Damnatio memoriae!!!
Just like the old Egyptian Pharaohs just CHIPPED away from existence, hieroglyphs no more.

Winston Smith’s exact job in the Minitrue!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_genocides_by_death_toll

Of all the genocides of history how many do we know? How many do we talk about?

To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize – wrongly attributed to Voltaire

Real source:

Kevin Alfred Strom a proud Neo Nazi who is in jail for pedophilia. I think the context of the quote was in an essay praising Hitler and the Nazi party for their attempted genocide against European Jews.

Now I am usually very strong on examining the source first and at all cost but then I try to take the aphorism at face value:

To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize

And it might be more complicated than I think even though the direction pointing  of this line seems obvious.

Still I do hate that “history” has forgotten them poor gypsies fags and retards not mentioning the Soviets and the Poles here.

Mind you, history and media will never ever be what really happens or happened anyhoot.

     No worries all dem words will quickly be forgotten in this
prolefeed: The steady stream of mindless entertainment to distract and occupy the masses.

Prolefeed sounds more Huxleyan than Orwellian to me though

but yeah the 

“what’s a word for really big now more gigantic than gigantic” 

amount of idle info we get now will lull us to the next subject faster than light itself.

Like the Bee Gees said It's only WORDS

At the rate of the American madness now Mexicans might become unpersons soon too! :P 

SSDD PART DEUX aka a jerry-rig of presumption and dumb will

Arguing is getting more and more pointless.

It’s like trying to carry a rational debate with a condescending drunk or

Having a fight of words with a parochial uneducated unread skinhead.

One could bring 1000 examples and solid proofs and not be ahead an inch the other one just waiting for his turn to talk, not hearing shit of all you just said, skimming the solid material to pick at minor details.

There is no left and the right is going bonkers

How will you ever change one billion hysterical Hindus?

How will you convert one billion misguided Muslims?

How will you bring to light one billion self-righteous Christians?

Don’t even try to prove a point with the so-called rational atheists now.

Many of them have done what all humanity has done forever: let the power go to their head and become little gods of their own with their own tangents, their own agenda and above all their own profits.

How many times have we seen an idealist socialist, a worker, a labourer turn to the extreme right once HE wasn’t poor anymore?

As if the whole of morality rested now on their informed shoulders FFS.

There will never be a solution to us anymore than there would be an idyllic monkey politics, we are just bigger louder apes but apes still.

And the world will always be a gigantic cacophonic Knesset.

A few dreamers have tried but none ever comes close enough.

The Zamyatins, the H.G. Wells, the Huxleys, the Orwells: they all have failed us.

We don’t have it, can’t get and more than likely never ever will.

No evolution, no eugenics, no hero can save us.

Ideally and even this word now has been destroyed as most words have lately

Ideally there should be no religion whatsoever no myths no lies except for the purpose of entertainment maybe like it is much easier to say a situation is Sisyphean then to explain the whole of Greek mythology and expressions like hell and purgatory have their emotional base if not any solid ground in reality. 

Most of us today in fact could use a Greek mythology metaphor and properly know that it IS a metaphor and a myth therefore a nice little children story to entertain.

But you say Burn in Hell and a million so-called intelligent self-righteous retarded beings actually believe that they are factual and real FFS so what is the fucking point?

My god has a bigger dick than your god is so puerile it should not even be discussed among adults.

To Kill a Mockingbird and Zola’s Germinal are pre social media stories but today’s hysteria is fuelled way too fast for anyone to follow anything and the dust never settles anymore so no one can see shit.  

The old illiterate hysteria has been replaced by a so-called literate well-informed hysteria when most of the information we receive at light speed is skewered biased alternate or just plain wrong disinformation cheap propaganda driven for the profit of someone somewhere.

Black is Black, White is White and 2 + 2 =4 

but beyond that all is uncertain  

and I am certain a few pugilistic brawlers will wanna take me on 2 + 2 =4 now.

Some people seem to need fables and lies to soften the harsh realities of life to children and then we go on being children all of our lives.  

The fact that it is all random number generation is all to frightening for most of us control freaks.  

We cannot admit there is no such thing as control, never was, never will be.

I wonder if a dying animal especially a prey dying of a ‘violent’ death realises it at the last moment? Control is an illusion a precious one but an illusion none the same.

This... This is what I'm talking about. This is what I mean when I'm talkin' about time, and death, and futility. All right, there are broader ideas at work, mainly what is owed between us as a society for our mutual illusions. Fourteen straight hours of staring at DB's, these are the things ya think of. You ever done that? You look in their eyes, even in a picture, doesn't matter if they're dead or alive, you can still read 'em. You know what you see? They welcomed it... Not at first, but... right there in the last instant. It's an unmistakable relief. See, cause they were afraid, and now they saw for the very first time how easy it was to just... let go. Yeah, they saw, in that last nanosecond, they saw... what they were. You, yourself, this whole big drama, it was never more than a jerry-rig of presumption and dumb will, and you could just let go. To finally know that you didn't have to hold on so tight. To realize that all your life - you know, all your love, all your hate, all your memories, all your pain - it was all the same thing. It was all the same dream, a dream that you had inside a locked room, a dream about being a person. And like a lot of dreams, there's a monster at the end of it.

 ~ good ole reliable Detective Rust Cohle