Wednesday, December 16, 2009



Nah make that TRIPLE TRIPLE.

It’s a Wonderful Life starring Joe Caissy

What did this angel have to do again to get his wings?

The film of my life! As if there was such a thing.

I hope the director is kind.

What did I do? Moreover what did I CHANGE?

What did I get and what did I miss not materially of course but in truth and spirit and understanding and wisdom?

Well the fire is not burning as high this morning and I have a feeling the fire will be burning low a little for the next 5-6 weeks to come. Getting some sort of a 6th sense about this bipolar (dis)order lately, some sort of extrapolation.

The point seems to be how you judge yourself matters very little in the big picture except maybe for moment of euphoria or a depression based on wrong premises that affect your mood of the moment but basically changes nothing to the big plan if there is a big plan.

One minute your life is over, the next it couldn’t be better and neither is a true picture of reality.

One minute I am worried to death and the next I don’t have a care in the world and who knows if I should care or not? The crux of the matter being that there is more than likely absolutely nothing I can do about many of these things. Being a bit of a worrier and somewhat of a hypochondriac here I tend to worry about every little pain or sign that my body sends me always fearing the worst, some people would say wishing or bringing the worst but I don’t think so.

If we knew the future all those insurance agents would go tits up and all those gamblers and ambulance chasers would go mad.

For one thing one almost never does the right thing and even when one does shit happens anyway but many of these killing diseases are brought upon us by ourselves, playing the odds or burying our head in the sand. Not only the favourites sin taxed pleasures are dangerous but many of our daily habits. For instance we all know smoking and drinking excessively is not the best thing one can do to increase his odds at longetivity but does that stop us? Pretty well the same with everything we put in our mouths really, question that egg that steak and those ever tempting fries or bacon or what not.

Sometimes the odds beat us and our lungs or our liver or our heart give up under the abuse or we just survive all odds and get hit by lightning at 92 or get shot at 78 like Gandhi or some other strange happening sitting at a cafe, minding out own business under a falling 1 ton block of concrete. One could get hit by a bus a 104 in fact.

So since we can’t determine when it’s time to go what does one do while he waits?

This Eternity notion is somewhat annoying and unnerving at times.

Another question in parenthesis is there such a thing as an appointed time no matter what?

The latest version of Time Machine (2002) with Guy Pierce raised this issue with a beautiful approach.

I could go on forever on Time Machine the Elohim and the Morlock but for the sake of concision, I will have to circumvent and circumcise this issue for now: Subject of a blog in the near future. Keep watching this station.

Can you change or stop or delay your time? There is one story in the bible where it was apparently possible (2 Kings 20) but the consensus seems to believe somehow (where they got it I don’t know) that when it’s time to go it’s time to go.

So lately I have been pushing my wussiness to the extreme by trying to stay on firm land as much as I can, taking as little chances as possible with a few gambling exceptions like drinking for instance.

Some people would say

Live Life to the Fullest

and I am trying to apply

Live Life to the Longest

somehow despite a few flaws in my system

because my quest, my search

seems so far from complete yet.

So many questions, so little time, so few answers! J

Speaking of time it’s also time to go here so stay tuned

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